Bringing up the talk in a relationship is not usually a fun-filled experience. It is especially not fun when you have been dating a man for several months and are still unofficial. In a case like this is bringing up the talk a good idea? I would say proceed with caution…

When you initiate some form of “the talk” by asking a man “where the relationship is going,” you are inadvertently putting all the power in his hands. Additionally, you are opening a conversation in which you may get an answer that you don’t like. If at this point he has not tried to “claim” you with some sort of exclusivity, he is being elusive and likely keeping his options open. The best case scenario could be that the guy is unsure of what he wants, but that is less likely the case. Men are territorial and if they really want something (or someone) they will stake a claim before it’s too late!

The chances are that it is not a very solid relationship if you have to ask a guy where this is going (especially after dating for a prolonged period of time). It is possible that this sort of relationship is suiting you at this time. Maybe you are not ready yourself? Maybe you aren’t 100% sold on this guy and are keeping your options open too? Maybe your ego is pushing you to get some outside validation in the form of a relationship, but your spirit knows this is not the relationship for you?

Asking a guy where you stand with him will put undo pressure on him. Men don’t like pressure and it will likely make him uncomfortable, as questioning a man can be viewed by him as confrontational.

I wouldn’t bring up the talk unless you are okay with getting the answer you do not want to hear. Unless you are at the end of your rope with this man and can’t take the uncertainty of the relationship don’t bring up “the talk.”

The bottom line is he hasn’t brought it up. That is indicative of how he feels and it is more likely than not he is feeling indifferent at this time. All is not lost. If you are bored an/or dating around there is no need to ditch this relationship. Just try not to take it to seriously or expect a ring out of it!

If you have any questions email me at HRH@psychicrelationshipcoach.com